A Friend with Benefits

No worries, I haven't rebounded that quick. But what I am referring to is a good friend of mine Kelly. I was thinking alot about her this weekend and realizing what a pivotal role she has played not just in my life but within this entire situation as a whole. I consider her a friend with benefits because not only does she have all of the necessary qualities of a best friend but she has gone above and beyond in the last 2 years.
Kel and I could not be more opposite in most areas of life. She is a very responsible, mature person. She is a planner, she is organized, a neat freak (OCD by her own admission), she sees 5 steps ahead in every situation and plans accordingly. I on the other hand am uber-laid back, spontaneous almost to a fault, an extreme goof ball, definately a free spirit. We've gotten into many discussions, debates, and sometimes arguments about our views on life, but the bottom line is that she accepts me for who I am and vice-versa. In the last 7 months as my life has taken an extreme down turn and all has been tested, she has stepped up in ways that are crazy to me. She is one of those "no matter what" types. Just like me.

I've realized that we have many similarities and some probably are a product of us rubbing off on eachother. But the benefit to Kelly and my friendship as it applies to my health and life right now is that she is constantly there for me as I try to be for her. And I know that for sure I couldn't have gotten through this with the strength, courage and dignity that I have if it wasn't for her. We talk probably a good 4 or 5 times a day and our first conversation is first thing in the morning when my pain and nausea is sometimes at it's worst. She knows exactly how to handle it and to get me on the right path for my day. She is almost an intrigal part of my stability right now. And I know most would say that well its easy for her, she doesn't work, she's a stay at home mom. Well I suppose technically that's true except for the major factor that our job is 24/7, stressful, draining, and keeps us on the tips of our toes. Plus I have helpers and she is just on her own. Our husbands both work constantly and she has a 3 and 6 year old. Not to mention she has to be the busiest person I know. There are some days talking to her and hearing her "to-do" list for the day is enough to make me want a nap. She'll notice grass on her floors and want them scrubbed, she is an artist and paints beautiful things so she constantly has many projects awaiting her attention. To top it all of, she probably has the most spotless house I've ever heard of, her kids are bathed all the time, she works out everyday and can take multiple showers. I envy her energy, her drive, responsibility, creativity, parenting, sex drive, her inner drill sergeant, eagerness, but most of all her heart. She has enough love for me and my children to include us in her everyday life. She constantly is giving me advice on how to help my girls, maintain the house, and to be a good family member. And the most amazing part of what makes her so special is that when she comes in to town to visit her family which keeps her so busy, she always makes time for the girls and I. She doesn't just stop by for a visit, she helps me organize, clean, she works to improve my life. There are so many benefits to my friend that it would be impossible to list them all. She can be 5 places at once and can do it with grace and unfortunately the occasional migraine. She strives to make others lives better and I mean everyone. Not just me and the girls, but she puts her husbands, childrens, and family's needs above her own. I know that is one of our similarities. We joke about it quite often.
That is another pivotal need for my life that she fufills effortless for me....laughter. She can find the humor in most anything, God bless her. Me, personally I would rather laugh and make a joke than take things too seriously and she can do that as well :)

And now my gratitude for Kelly is exacurbated because of what she did for me, pertaining to Lydia. When Kelly's daughter Natalie was born 3 years ago, she was born almost 5 months premature. I believe she was the 2nd earliest baby born that survived. Kelly's strenghth, courage and grace taught me that we can handle anything because of our faith. Well Natalie qualified for a host of programs because of her premie status and one of those was the Birth-3 program. About 7 months or so ago when I started noticing that Lydia was acting a little more strangely than uber-independent (and what couldn't be explained by genetics, lol) Kelly convinced me to have her evaluated by the Birth-3 program. For that I will be forever grateful. Not only did she handle me with kit gloves during the process, knowing I would inevitably internalize everything and blame myself, she talked me through it, calmed me down and helped me approach it in a healthy manner.

So bottom line in the last 13 years our friendship has pretty much seen it all. But our friendship is like fine wine, it does only improve with age. Although she's fancy wine and I am a good stiff drink. But the bottom line is at the end, both gets you to your "happy place". Just where our friendship gets me. So thankyou Kelly for being my friend with benefits. I love you so much honey. I only hope I am able to do half of the things you do for me. You have shown me how to be a better friend, and for that...I thank you :)

Your "other" half,
Chrissie :)